Justin and I spent a fantastic evening together yesterday celebrating our 4th wedding anniversary. It was a night i'll never forget! We didn't do anything amazing, but being able to spend the entire evening together was such a rich blessing.
Unlike me, Justin was super excited about our anniversary. I'm not entirely sure why, but to be honest, I was just viewing it as any other day. We had no plans to go out, in fact, we had no plans at all. We decided to just lay low and stay home. We didn't have enough money to go out and I didn't want to add more money to our credit card on something we didn't need. I was really okay with it.
During the course of the last year and especially the last few months, Justin and I have become even closer. We had both been praying before our move that God would give us a fresh start this new year and that we would both walk deeper, wider, higher with Him. I feel we've done an excellent job keeping each other accountable (I also have an amazing sister in love who keeps me on track too!! Love ya sis!). My love for the Lord has grown leaps and bounds. I have enjoyed reading my Bible daily and spending many many hours praying (I try to pray all during the course of the day when God reminds me of something or someone to pray for). Now, I don't say all that to gloat or boast about myself, I say it in complete humility. I have become quieter in a sense and more ready to receive and listen. I am head over heels for my Savior.
The last 4 years haven't been without our fair share of trials both good and bad. I don't share this often, but Justin and I hit as close to rock bottom as I ever want to get. The D word never came up, but we were both unhappy. A lot had happened in the course of a few years. We got married, got pregnant, joined the Marines, had a baby, moved across the country, and the shortly there after Justin deployed. I figured if we survived the deployment then we would be fine, but what I failed to realize is that I never once put our marriage in God's hands. I never let Him lead... I'm a control freak, God is working on me. I just figured we'd make it if he came home alive... (Great thinking, eh?)
Once Justin was home and the initial bliss had died down, God revealed to me how much we needed Him front and center in every area of our lives. The Lord began convicting my heart in many areas. Over the course of the year we faced new challenges that I'm sure most married people at our stage had already experienced because they spent more than a few months here, a few months there, together. We became closer and more unified, just as God had intended.
Now fast forward, here on February 4, 2010. Four very fast years later, I stand in awe of all God has blessed us with. I am so humbled and grateful for all we've been given.
Yesterday I never once prayed that God would provide us a way to go out on a date, but He knew my hearts desire. When everything fell into place I was reminded of a verse in Romans.
"Likewise the Spirit also helps in our weaknesses. For we do not know what we should pray for as we ought, but the Spirit Himself makes intercession for us with groanings which cannot be uttered." Romans 8:26
The Lord knew even without me saying a word. How awesome is that? The Holy Spirit is interceding for me because of my weaknesses (and sometimes pride). I am so so so so thankful for God sending His son to die for me so that He can intercede when I cannot even utter a word!
I'm ending with a short message to my beloved. Be blessed this week in whatever happens!
You are an incredible man of God. Your tender heart for the Lord, Elijah, and myself makes me fall in love with you all over again. In the almost 6 years we've been together you have taught me what unconditional love is. I am so thankful for all that you bring to this family. As I reflect on the last 4 years I am so blessed and incredibly honored that God chose me to be your wife! I pray these new 4 years God would use us to further His kingdom as we draw closer together in Him. You are the light of my life. I don't know what I would do without you. Thank you for daily choosing to love me, even when I down right don't deserve it. Thank you for your willingness to serve me. Thank you for giving me the cutest, smart, fun-loving, little boy ever!!